The Worst Part

“What’s the worst part of having Parkinson’s?” The question threw me off a bit. At first I started ranking my symptoms in my head. The worst is the tremor. Number two is the sleep issues. Third is the constipation. No…wait…constipation is “number two” for obvious reasons. Which means the urinary problems must be “number one”…

The group leader might as well have asked, “what’s the best part of having Parkinson’s?” Number one, I am always ready to write my name in the snow in yellow. Number two, I never need to sit on a public toilet again because I hardly ever go (puns intended). Thirdly, I can make one hell of a martini. Shaken, not stirred.

So you see, there is no order. No sense can be made from ranking symptoms and there is nothing but easy peeing, hard pooping, and rampant alcoholism no matter how I look at it. So when the group leader asked me, I simply said, “Having Parkinson’s is the worst part of having Parkinson’s